IMPENDING BIOGRAPHY.

Posted: November 17, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

 

“I’m six solid chapters in!” Was what I exclaimed to my nosey sister one month after I’d started writing my life story. It was going well, the writing that is, until the same nosey sister pointed out a hitch in the plan. Maybe I should start by giving a brief synopsis of the six chapters? Well, I’m 10 years into the future in the first chapter…strange, I know, but it’s twisted in such a way that readers will find it stimulating. I hope.

In the future, I’ve envisioned myself to be a tongue-lashing mom yelling at my three year old daughter for playing in the rain. Fast forward to chapter 2 where I enter the world, childhood tales etc. etc. Know what? This synopsis thing isn’t working at ALL. It’s bad enough that I have to sit myself down and write a whole book. That’s no mean feat.

I’ll just go straight to the snag that the sister pointed out. It’s Tuesday evening and I’m otherwise unoccupied. I decide to pen a chapter or two for the book and my sister, let’s call her Nancy, shows up and asks what I’m doing typing away instead of helping her with her constitutional law assignment.

I’m writing a book.” I state shortly.

“You’ll never finish”

“Says who?”

“ME sis, how many books have you set out writing before? You completed any yet?”

“I have in fact completed two Nancy.” That was a lie of some sorts. I had completed one…not completed COMPLETED, there was still lots of editing to be done and stuff.

“Oh, you have? That’s great. Can I read it?”

“Nope.”

“Okay, sooo, what are you writing now?”

“My biography.” A short silence that spoke volumes ensued. I stopped typing and looked at her. Then as our eyes met, she burst out laughing…showy giggles that peeved me to no end.

“What’s funny?” I’m exasperated.

“Nothing, nothing…carry on.”

“Yes, I will. Go away, you’re distracting me.”

“Hahah sis si nilidhani biographies zinaandikwa na watu wako famous.”

Kiswahili for, “Aren’t biographies written by famous people?”

“What do you know, I’m famous. Go away!” She left, leaving me in deep contemplation. She was right in a way. Most, in fact ALL biographies I’ve read are written by famous people, not gaunt and scrawny twenty year olds who’ve done absolutely nothing to create an almighty impact in the world. Of course, now I have doubts about going through with this for the simple reason that I’m not legendary…but then again, the very same meddlesome sister always told me that one day we’d be famous. The “how” in being famous, we really don’t know. I guess I’ll just keep writing the book for when we’re famous. Simple solution.

V.O.

 

 

 

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