Posted: September 27, 2013 in Uncategorized

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Life rules from Bud not Buddy.

 

 

For the hell of it, I wanted you guys to err, learn some “serious” skills I recently read from a novel. Enjoy.

1.            If you got to tell a lie, make sure it’s simple and easy to remember.

 

2.            You have to give adults something that they can use to hurt you by taking it away. That way they might not take something that you really want. Unless they’re crazy or really stupid they won’t take everything because if they did they wouldn’t have anything to hold over your head to hurt you with later.

 

3.            When you make up your mind to do something, hurry up and do it, if you wait you might talk yourself out of what you wanted in the first place.

 

4.            If an adult tells you not to worry, and you weren’t worried before, you better hurry up and start cause you’re already running late.

 

5.            If a grown up starts a sentence with “haven’t you heard” get ready cause what’s about to come out of their mouth is gonna drop you headfirst into a boiling tragedy.

 

6.            When an adult tells you they need your help with a problem, get ready to be tricked. Most times this means they just want you to go fetch something for them.

 

7.            When you wake up and don’t know for sure where you are and there’s a bunch of people standing around you, it’s best to pretend you’re still asleep until you can figure out what’s going on and what you should do.

 

8.            Whenever an adult tells you to listen carefully and talks to you in a real calm voice do not listen. Run as fast as you can because something real terrible is just round the corner. Especially if the cops are chasing you.

 

9.            Never, ever say something bad about someone you don’t know- especially when you’re around a bunch of strangers. You never can tell who might be kin to that person or who might be a lip-flapping, big-mouth spy.

 

10.                    Gone= dead.

 

11.                    The older you get, the worse something has to be to make you cry.

 

 

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Life rules from Bud not Buddy.

 

 

For the hell of it, I wanted you guys to err, learn some “serious” skills I recently read from a novel. Enjoy.

1.            If you got to tell a lie, make sure it’s simple and easy to remember.

 

2.            You have to give adults something that they can use to hurt you by taking it away. That way they might not take something that you really want. Unless they’re crazy or really stupid they won’t take everything because if they did they wouldn’t have anything to hold over your head to hurt you with later.

 

3.            When you make up your mind to do something, hurry up and do it, if you wait you might talk yourself out of what you wanted in the first place.

 

4.            If an adult tells you not to worry, and you weren’t worried before, you better hurry up and start cause you’re already running late.

 

5.            If a grown up starts a sentence with “haven’t you heard” get ready cause what’s about to come out of their mouth is gonna drop you headfirst into a boiling tragedy.

 

6.            When an adult tells you they need your help with a problem, get ready to be tricked. Most times this means they just want you to go fetch something for them.

 

7.            When you wake up and don’t know for sure where you are and there’s a bunch of people standing around you, it’s best to pretend you’re still asleep until you can figure out what’s going on and what you should do.

 

8.            Whenever an adult tells you to listen carefully and talks to you in a real calm voice do not listen. Run as fast as you can because something real terrible is just round the corner. Especially if the cops are chasing you.

 

9.            Never, ever say something bad about someone you don’t know- especially when you’re around a bunch of strangers. You never can tell who might be kin to that person or who might be a lip-flapping, big-mouth spy.

 

10.                    Gone= dead.

 

11.                    The older you get, the worse something has to be to make you cry.

 

 

 

 

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Life rules from Bud not Buddy.

 

 

For the hell of it, I wanted you guys to err, learn some “serious” skills I recently read from a novel. Enjoy.

1.            If you got to tell a lie, make sure it’s simple and easy to remember.

 

2.            You have to give adults something that they can use to hurt you by taking it away. That way they might not take something that you really want. Unless they’re crazy or really stupid they won’t take everything because if they did they wouldn’t have anything to hold over your head to hurt you with later.

 

3.            When you make up your mind to do something, hurry up and do it, if you wait you might talk yourself out of what you wanted in the first place.

 

4.            If an adult tells you not to worry, and you weren’t worried before, you better hurry up and start cause you’re already running late.

 

5.            If a grown up starts a sentence with “haven’t you heard” get ready cause what’s about to come out of their mouth is gonna drop you headfirst into a boiling tragedy.

 

6.            When an adult tells you they need your help with a problem, get ready to be tricked. Most times this means they just want you to go fetch something for them.

 

7.            When you wake up and don’t know for sure where you are and there’s a bunch of people standing around you, it’s best to pretend you’re still asleep until you can figure out what’s going on and what you should do.

 

8.            Whenever an adult tells you to listen carefully and talks to you in a real calm voice do not listen. Run as fast as you can because something real terrible is just round the corner. Especially if the cops are chasing you.

 

9.            Never, ever say something bad about someone you don’t know- especially when you’re around a bunch of strangers. You never can tell who might be kin to that person or who might be a lip-flapping, big-mouth spy.

 

10.                    Gone= dead.

 

11.                    The older you get, the worse something has to be to make you cry.

 

 

 

  

 

 

  

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